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The Game I’m Playing: Putting Your Purpose to Work

by | Jun 15, 2011 | Career Skills, Coaching, life purpose, Negotiation, Site News

chessboard

In my last post, I talked about game theory and how it informs my view of careers and business, and concluded that I need to do a better job explaining what game I am playing.

Let’s get to it!

If I have a game, it’s called Putting Your Purpose to Work. The point of the game is lifting people up to live according to their purpose, and creating conversations that help organizations change in ways that allow them to do so. Specifically, I am doing this because I know it is needed, and that people like me need it.

I work primarily with educators because we (and society) routinely undervalue what we do, and we normalize it by accepting conventional wisdom and ways of doing things that are just plain wrong. The rules, as we are taught to accept them, limit the potential of those participating in the system, by strictly defining who can or cannot play, who is allowed on certain turf, and what rules apply, whether they make sense or not. Kind of reminds you of the times in elementary school when no one picked you for kickball, right? Well, that happened to me a lot, so I stopped playing kickball.

I played by the accepted rules for a long time, and it was killing me. So I changed the game, I bought my own turf, and I’ve been giving away tickets to the game for the last two years. Attendance has been low (only about 20,000 visits over the last two years), but for most of that time, I was playing it safe (or being overly cautious and driven by fear of bankrupting my family.) I have not been jumping the gate into anyone else’s stadium, I’m not playing their game nor accepting their rules. I’m not borrowing their field, and I’ve brought my own ball. This is a different game, I’m playing to a different audience, and I intend to win. I hope you win, too.

Who has an unfair advantage in this kind of scenario? Some might argue that it’s the established system, the old guard, and those people they accept and embrace as the next era of visionaries. Me, I say “meet the new boss, same as the old boss.” That’s business. That’s institutions. That’s closed-system thinking, which assumes that the only people who can get into the game are those with a ticket, or those who jump the gate.

I don’t need to jump the gate. I have my own stadium. It’s got great loudspeakers, a few loyal fans who get me (you know who you are, and thanks!), some others who seem at least mildly intrigued by what I am doing (even those who are annoyed by it or don’t completely understand it), and the beer’s pretty good over here. (No point in owning a stadium if you aren’t going to serve good beer, I say.)

What’s your game?

Whose rules are you playing by?

Do you intend to win?

If you do intend to win, will it be at someone else’s expense?

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Game Theory 101: Don’t Play Games. Win Them!

by | Jun 14, 2011 | Career Skills, Negotiation, Site News

bigstock_Man_Playing_A_Video_Game_1575481

Games are always a part of business, and many times a part of life. Whether you enjoy a game or not depends on a couple of factors:

  • Whether you want to play a game
  • Whether you are playing the same game others are playing
  • Whether you agree with the other players about how the game should be played
  • Whether one side or the other has an unfair advantage (or is cheating)
  • How big the risk is, in comparison to the reward

I’m not a hard-core gamer. I appreciate those who are, and can identify with where they are coming from. I used to play video games quite a bit, but I wasn’t very good at them. Not terrible, just easily bored. I only have a certain amount of energy to put into playing a game, and when I get bored, I usually stop playing and don’t go back to the game for a long, long time–and then more to figure out why I liked it, or to intentionally waste time. So, in most cases, I don’t want to play games (at least not the ones other people are playing.) Tactical exchange bores me easily, because I’m less worried about objectives, and more worried about winning the war.

This is different for me if the game is strategic, but most video games aren’t. They are tactical, and have clear objectives, definite results, and limited rewards. I like that stuff for a little while, but overall, I am a strategic, long-haul thinker, and as a result, people don’t get what I’m doing, because I am often playing another game altogether (a game within the game, or a game I am making up outside of the game.) So it’s about understanding game theory, more than winning a particular game

I also don’t believe that life is a zero-sum game, like poker, where someone has to lose for others to win. I actually think that cooperative games, played over the long haul, can result in unexpected outcomes for all players. The point of playing the game is still to win. But more than one person can win, and it doesn’t have to be at the expense of others.

This doesn’t remove the need to be self-interested and protect your goals. It just means that you don’t have to take something away from others to win. It does reinforce the inherent need to keep others from causing you harm. Like I said before, I generally prefer not to play games. But if forced to play, I do my best to win. And if people go for my throat, I don’t hesitate to fight back, and to do so on my own terms.

In a couple of recent conversations, I’ve tried explaining to people what exactly I am trying to do with my coaching business, programs and websites. They didn’t get it. I had a conversation with another person about these conversations. It was a social setting and this was a friend, so our talk was free-flowing as we had beers with a few others involved in a community organization (Athfest) that I am involved in.

These are the conclusions we arrived at:

  1. I need to do a better job explaining myself and what I do.
  2. Other people probably still won’t get it, because they think I am playing a different game. And…
  3. People will understand what I am talking about in five years, when it’s an established way of doing things, and accepted as common wisdom and common practice.

What game are you playing?

Whose rules are you playing by?

How committed are you to winning?

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SuperVision: How to Answer Questions About Your Supervisory Style

by | Jun 2, 2011 | Interview Tips, Job Search, job search tools, Podcast

bigstock_Steak_435080Supervision is hard. Developing a coherent supervisory style is even harder. And explaining your supervisory style in an interview? Really, really hard.

On tomorrow’s episode of The Grill,  at 11 a.m. ET, John Mayo and I will be discussing how to approach questions about supervision and your supervisory style in a job interview.

As usual, we’ll throw a few typical interview questions  on “The Grill,” and discuss:

  • What an interviewer is really asking (the question within the question–i.e., what they really mean)
  • How to approach answering the real question
  • Good ways to answer
  • Bad ways to answer

And then, hopefully, we’ll take your calls. Call us at 1 (347) 989-0055 to take a stab at answering the questions, and we’ll offer you a live critique and our honest feedback. If you’d prefer, you can also Skype in from the episode page on BlogTalkRadio, by using the Blue “S” click-to-talk button on the page. And whether you listen live or not, we’ll continue the discussions on the Cook Coaching Facebook page, where you can also check out past questions and try your luck at answering those, too. And a few times each day, I add some interesting posts there, and you can discuss any past articles from the website.

Since we did not have a live segment last week, anyone who listened to the previous episode, What Comes Easy and What Comes Hard, will be welcome to call in and give a shot at those questions. I had a few people express interest, and had hope to schedule a follow-up teleconference, but some other business details got in the way this week. So please feel free to call in and answer those questions, too.

Please join us as we throw this week’s questions on The Grill. We’re looking forward to talking to you!

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Salary Matters: 5 Ways to Find Out About Pay Without Asking

by | May 9, 2011 | Job Search, Negotiation

bigstockphoto_freephoto-brass_bank_1495393-150x150-copyDiscussing salary is easily the one part of the job search process that causes candidates universal anxiety. One of the search terms that job-seekers look  up, before arriving at this site, is “tactfully asking about salary.”

Since asking about salary is such a nerve-wracking experience, here are five ways to find out about salary without asking (or at least asking outright).

  1. Refer back to the job posting and see if a “salary range” is indicated. Anticipate that most hiring agents will make an offer between the minimum and the mid-point of that range, with early-career candidates being offered closer to the minimum, and more experienced candidates being offered toward the mid-point. In very few cases should you expect an offer to be made above the mid-point; organizations want to hire people who can grow into the position before their salary expectations outgrow what the organization can pay. It’s a question of value: no matter how good you are in general, they have placed a maximum value on what the work at that level is worth to the organization. If you need more than that, don’t apply for the job.
  2. Visit the Human Resources website for the institution and see if there is a section with information about salary, compensation and benefits. In this section, search for the terms “pay scale,” “salary bands,” “pay grades,” “salary grades” and “salary levels.” If the institution has this sort of system, see if you can find level at which the position is classified; this may be listed in the posting. Public institutions are more likely to have this information posted, since many states require that information about employee pay scales be released to the public. If you do find these listed, refer back to the advice from #1 and figure the pay will be between the minimum and mid-point.
  3. Ask someone who works at the institution, but outside the hiring circle for the department where you are applying. If you can find such a person in the same department, or who holds (or has held) a similar position (in title or pay band), they should be able to at least give you context about what they make, and may be able to give you some context based on that experience. They may also have access to internal systems where they can see different information than the general public (like new employee manuals, benefit guides, etc.)
  4. Call someone at Human Resources and ask what the “typical” hiring range is for a position at that title and grade. Indicate that you believe you may be interested in the position but don’t want to waste anyone’s time (theirs or yours) by applying to a job you can’t afford to take. As long as you say it diplomatically and convey that you are asking for those reasons, you’ll likely be fine, in the eyes of Human Resources. It shows that you are a serious candidate if you do apply.
  5. Google it. You never really know what you might find out. Try “salary range” for “title,” and “institution,” and see what comes back. I did this for several positions and the search returned recent job listings, with salary information, a couple of perspective pieces by student affairs professionals about jobs and salaries, and one site called GlassDoor.Com, which lets you search for salaries by job title. (That would’ve been a number 6, I guess, but I didn’t want to change the title of the article.)

Whatever you choose to do, I advise against asking outright about a specific salary number, related to your candidacy, until you have been made an offer. When you are offered a job, a starting point for the salary discussion will be included in the initial offer.  Don’t react to the first number you if you can help yourself. Just ask how they came up with the number, and why they feel it would be a fair offer, given your education, skills and experience. Then take some time to think about whether the offer is fair. If it is, you can take it or maybe see if you could make a counter-offer to see if you could do a bit better. But if you are happy with the salary, there’s nothing wrong with just taking it and getting to work. If you aren’t, go back with a counter offer, but be sure to base it on the value you will create for the employer (i.e., how you will earn the higher salary through hard work and productivity.

What other ways can you think of to “ask without asking?”

Some good resources to help you explore ways to approach salary negotiation:

Negotiating a Job Offer: Do’s and Don’ts

Sealing the Deal: Questions to Ask Yourself When Faced with “The Offer”

Job Search 101 Video on YouTube from USC’s Annenberg School

Interview Tip: Leave the Salary Out of It on Newly Corporate

 

 


Interview Travel Etiquette: How to Tactfully Manage the Conversation

Interview Travel Etiquette: How to Tactfully Manage the Conversation

by | Apr 8, 2011 | Job Search

Being invited to interview on-site for a job you are really interested in is exciting and nerve-wracking at the same time. If you are like most candidates, you look forward to the campus interview, but dread the conversations leading up to it. Travel costs add up, and you have to watch your bottom line. So how should you broach the subject with a potential employer?

How to Start the Conversation

First, go in knowing that most employers will not be surprised that you are bringing up the subject. Hiring people costs money, and getting the candidate to the interview is pretty essential for most positions. So don’t be afraid to ask. Just be polite and tactful, and things will work usually work out.

Who Should Pay for Interview Travel?

Well, in an ideal world, the employer would always pay (at least that’s my 2 cents on the matter), but the reality is that some schools pay for travel, and some don’t. Some pay, but cap reimbursements per candidate. Some will pay only if you aren’t offered a position, or if you accept an offer if one is made. (i.e., if they offer, but you decline, you do not get reimbursed.)

What’s the Etiquette?

Ask questions upfront about whether the university reimburses for any part of candidate travel, before formally accepting an on-site interview.

If being reimbursed…

  • Communicate about costs before booking flights
  • Keep all receipts,
  • Log any mileage on your personal vehicle
  • Ask when to submit receipts (usually with a day or two of your return)

Frequently Asked Questions:

Is it really okay to ask about reimbursement?

Yes, employers understand that candidates need to watch expenses.

Should I try to negotiate?

Most employers will have general rules. Ask what their policies are.

Tactful Tips

  • If there is a cap on reimbursement, understand that, and try to work within it.
  • Always try to find bargains if being reimbursed.
  • Don’t accept an interview if you can’t afford to cover your out-of-pocket costs.